I Invite You To Vent - Share Your Pain
I'm sitting in a coffee shop crying. Let me say that I am NOT hormonal.
My anti-anxiety meds are working fine. All that must mean that I am in actual emotional pain. We all do different things when we're in pain. I talk to friends and my husband. And I write...so here I am, doing just that.
I'm a pretty optimistic, positive person, in general. I love much about my life and life itself. It takes a lot to bring me down. The "lot" doesn't have to be a big event or tragedy. Today, it's a lot of little things that have added up and weigh so heavily on my heart.
I'm going to put myself out there. (Though for privacy's sake and in full disclosure, I'm not going to include a few things that need to stay personal.)
Here are 5 reasons that are pushing me over the edge today. If you are familiar with these feelings when you read this, please share. This is when our Virtual Village is most important. This is when support matters the most and when we reassure ourselves and each other that we're not alone in this. This pain is real.
1. My tween has had no less than five outbursts at me this week that ended in tears. These feelings carry into the next day, resolve with hugs and apologies, and then the process begins again.
2. I feel like I can't do anything right. Or maybe it's just EVERYthing right. It feels like each week that passes I check less off my list and, instead, add to it. I can't keep up. Things fall through the cracks.
3. When it rains. You know those times when you can't catch a break? You are hit from all sides, whether it's at home, work, sickness, kids, pets. This is one of those weeks when our old dog is limping and I can't help him. Kids are in complaint-mode. I came down with a miserable cold. There's more but let's stop at three.
4. It's been awhile since I've felt fulfilled. That seems a tall order when you're juggling home, kids, maybe work and pets, bills, and if we're lucky, an outlet like exercise and / or a hobby. Instead, for me, I wind up doing a bit of these things here and there, never really feeling like I accomplished anything. I suppose this is time management.
5. I feel utterly taken for granted. Like I'm the catalyst for everyone else, the overlooked servant, a glorified (not really) Uber driver. I cook meals from scratch and at least one person is disgusted, openly, by what's on their plate.
If you relate to any of these, please share here. Let's make each other feel better with virtual hugs, words of support.